Source: Are new Prezident
Are New Prezident Donald Trump
Full Gospel Christian School, Plano Grade 8
Larry Lawlor, Jr.
Are new prezident is named Donald Trump. prezident Trump was born in New York America and he is an old man of 70. Are new prezident is a very rich man. They say he is worth trilyuns of dollars in real estate alone. Well my father is also in real estate he sells houses and sez he doesn’t have jack which means he isn’t selling any houses in Plano.
My mother works two jobs as a recepsinist and as a subsidute teacher here at Full Gospel. When I ask them why we don’t have jack my dad sez ask the muslan He means the fake prezident who ruled over us for eight years while Christians suffered gratefully sez Mrs. Grundy our teacher.
The teacher sez we shuld organize this essay careful and think before we rite. Okay so how do I feel about the new prezident, just great. He looks fat on TV but my dad sez it isn’t beer if a man is rich he is a little fat. Well we don’t have jack but my dad weighs about 340 so I am not so sure. My dad was a Plano High School football player Mvp and fought muslans in Irack Won in those pitchers he looks poor. prezident Trump sez we should never have been in Irack Too but wants us to bomb other places like I-Ran and North Career. The sooner the better sez my dad he sez it all the time.
My dad sez he is sick of people treeting our prezident like chicken shit especially the news. He can’t sit through news anymore he just goes in the kitchen and drinks beer and sez I wish your mother would get her ass home because I done want pizza again. Mrs Grundy sez the same thing not about my mom but about the news treating out prezident like shit. Sorry teacher like crap.
Yesterdy we read a gospel story about Jesus feeding 5000 people with 2 fishs and a loafs of bread. Mrs Grundy said to us What is the problem and we all laugh and say isn’t no way to feed that many people with 2 fish. Thats right she sez and she sez well just because you didn’t see it doesn’t mean ther wasn’t 5000 people does it and we all said No Mrs Grundy, and we laft. You done need to see everthing to believe it she sez and did you see when you was born no or when the world was made but here you are and here it is, So we all say Yes Mrs Grundy we are and I laft till I peed my pants. So she sez the Bible sez that onst Jesus appeared to 500 people when he died. No one sez different or he didn’t or that there was just 5 people do they? Maybe Juice and sexshual pervurts. It means that when the prezident sees milyunss there really are milyuns not just five she sez because he is the prezident and he has the ability to see things normal people don’t see just like God. My dad just sez theres no lying muslan to hurt us anymore and that we’re safe and what prezident trump says Goes. Dad never tells is where it goes, but he talks that way.
My daddy never gets sick but my mama had to sign up for Medicade because there are six of us and no medizin. Now that Trump is prezident we can have our doctors and medizin comes free free dad says. Three of us are here at Full Gospel my little sister in sekund grade and my little bruther in grade four. We bring lunch which is usilly baloney with spread and hard egg plus peenuts and candybar. Mrs Grundy sez this is much better than letting tacksplayers pay for us and we don’t need there money but that now a good christian woman named Betsy like the womin who sowed our first flag will take care of us. Me and my friends will get tickets or somethings which is better than cash and best of all we will still have bible reading and gospel singing. Sometimes Mrs Grundy gets mad like when this one girl Doris said her mom thinks we are killing urselves by burning crap for fuel and that the ice is melting at the north pole. Teacher told her to stand outside for an hour and then she sez Doris do you still think the ice is melting and Doris sez No maam. So she sez good because there aint nothing about no ice melting anywhere in the Bible is there. Bible done talk about ice melting. We know how the world will end it will end when it explodes in fire and then you will see Jesus and you need to be ready for that. So Doris sat down and looked sad. I laft so hard I peed my pants.
Daddy says now he can keep his guns which he means that the black muslan prezzident was going to take away so we are happy. Me and my brothers all has one gun except Jake who is four and just has an air rifle but daddy has 62 guns because when they come for us we’re ready. Mrs Grundy sez theer are difernt ways to be ready but the best reason is to meet the Lord. But daddy sez tell that teacher she sure as hell better have a gun before that big day and he sez our prezident is catching milyuns of muslans before they can kill us so we also need to burn there churches and make them go home. I guess they are catching them in steel traps. I ask him why are they coming to Plano and he said for our freedom and medizin.
In my school we don’t need to learn about other places outside America except Isreal where the Lord will come in the last daze. Juice live their now and we hate Juice but they are important because that’s where the armed-guarden will start so I askt daddy will you fight in that war but he just went for another beer.
It is hard to rite an essay but the thing is I am very happy that we have a real prezident who will give me school tickets and can feed so many people and also medizin for free. Daddy sez everybody will have a job now and we won’t have to wear seat belts no more and not pee in the stream we can pee anywhere we damn well please even on the sidewalk in front of the Juice church in town. The paper factory here in Plano is already going to dump its wash into the red river even though a few years ago some people at the River of Glory Mobile Park got sick.
My mama got home real late last night and daddy sez theer was a time he could of beat her for that but now the police will come but he said that’s changing. And this is why I love our new prezident.